< Into the Underworld | Red Ice Logs | The Saunaplex >


  • Carmine Rain Hunter leans in through the door, hair ruffled, ichor and blood spattered across the red-lacquered Starmetal armor he wears. One hand holds a broken spear haft, the other gripping one horn from a particularly fearsome-looking demon's head. "You...wanted to see me about something?"
  • Madame Mandana stares, wide-eyed. The blue-skinned woman appears utterly shocked, her blond hair in its tight bun is immaculate, but her severe-featured face is utterly horrified, mouth wide open and sky-blue eyes bugging from their sockets. "Wha..what..WHAT is that!"
  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks down at the broken spear. "Um..he was a little sturdier than I expected."

Madame Mandana "You were supposed to observe, Carmine Rain Hunter! Observe! And..and..you walked like THAT through the streets!? What..how.."

  • Madame Mandana appears stricken speechless by this.

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I avoided the public, I came straight to your office. I know I was only supposed to observe, but the demon lunged at a child, I had to kill it."

Madame Mandana "That may be a commendable reaction, but it was not the proper one in this case! Do you have any idea what kind of repercussions this might have!"

  • Carmine Rain Hunter blinks. "Um...one less soldier in the armies of hell?"
  • Madame Mandana looks down her beak-like nose at the blood-soaked man. "No. You may have compromised your position! What if local authorities saw you? What will the civilian populace think? And where is the *rest* of the demon? Laying about somewhere, causing problems. Not to MENTION that you walked, however discreetly, through the streets of Heaven dripping blood from every hair and appendage!"
  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks very surprised at her reaction. "I burned the corpse and buried the ashes! Even set wards! I was careful and discreet!" He drops the demon's head, crossing his arms across his chest. "And not ¬every¬ appendage...."

Madame Mandana: "There is a hole in your groin-plate. But I won't bother to visually verify that statement...regardless, you are out of order! How am I supposed to deal with this. Last month you severely beat a man accused of theft when he drew a knife on law enforcement personnel. It turned out that they had been bribed to frame and murder HIM! And now this! What if that demon had been summoned and had a purpose! There is always a reason to do more research, learn more and discover all possible permutations of your actions."

Madame Mandana: "I simply can not deal with this continued over-reaction, Carmine Rain Hunter."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks hurt and sinks slowly to a stone bench. "...I'm just trying to help..."

Madame Mandana "That may be, Carmine Rain Hunter. But you are "helping" too much. And your behavior seems to be deteriorating."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter gestures as though trying to explain, but just winds up sighing and looking down.
  • Madame Mandana softens her expression somewhat. "I will, however, be lenient since you are so newly Exalted. Instead of having your soul torn from your body and devoured by the next Celestial Lion on the Roster of Criminal Ingestion, I will simply transfer you to a more..suitable office."
  • Carmine Rain Hunter blinks. "...even if you weren't being lenient, wouldn't that be a little, um, excessive?"
  • Madame Mandana shakes her head. "Your behavior is most dangerous, Carmine. It shows an inability to balance your duties successfully. Febrisa is most skilled at dealing with emotionally troubled agents. If she had not recently been forced to incinerate her last aid, I am afraid it would be the Celestial Lion for you."
  • Carmine Rain Hunter blinks again. "Emotionally troubled? Whoa, whoa. I'm fine! You know me, I'm just trying to help!"

Madame Mandana: "Your actions speak otherwise, Carmine Rain Hunter. I am sorry. Your transfer is non-negotiable."

Carmine Rain Hunter "Can't we talk about this? Are you sure this isn't about that dinner that I missed? 'Cause I'm really sorry about that, I just got caught up working, I didn't mean to miss it, I know you wanted me to meet your ..."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter cuts himself off, swallows, and stands.
  • Madame Mandana sighs. "The fact that you could not tear yourself away from a mission that involved simply watching an imprisoned murderer to make sure his cell was uncomfortable enough to meet my sister, who is by the way very angry with you, is further proof. Your new assignment is Office 6."
  • Carmine Rain Hunter clenches his jaw. "...Office 6?"

Carmine Rain Hunter: "But...could you apologize to your sister for me?"

Madame Mandana: "Yes. Once you return the armor and clean yourself, you will report there. And I am afraid you must apologize to her yourself."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Return the armor? This armor fits so well, though!"

Madame Mandana: "But it is not yours. It must be returned to the armory."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter glances down at the well-fitting suit of Starmetal and sighs. "...alright. Can you at least tell your sister I'm sorry and that I'll make it up to her?"
  • Madame Mandana shakes her head. "You will have to take care of all that yourself...I would advise you find some sort protection before meeting her."

Carmine Rain Hunter "Please? Pretty please? Is there any way I could get you to talk her down from her rage?"

Madame Mandana: "You are dismissed, Carmine Rain Hunter."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter extends his arms. "Come on...can't you just talk to her?" Unbelievably, he seems charming. Maybe even a little vulnerable and sweet.
  • Madame Mandana points a finger severely!
  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks quite crestfallen, and starts unfastening all the buckles of his armor.

Madame Mandana "Strip elsewhere, please."

Carmine Rain Hunter "I'm not stripping, just leaving the armor!"

Madame Mandana "Leave it in the armory."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter sighs. "Fine, fine. I'll leave it at the damn armory."

Outside the office of Febrisa, Lesser Fire Dragon and Magistra of Office 6, Carmine Rain Hunter sees another Red waiting, peering around as if looking for someone else.

Arkadi The Red in question, is irately puffing away on a cigarette by this point, not looking particularly pleased to be here...

  • Carmine Rain Hunter coughs quietly as he approaches, dressed in a set of lacquered steel armor, the gear still a bit dusty from being dragged out of storage.

Arkadi 'Where the bloody hell *is* he...don't got all goddamned day here....'

  • Arkadi is of average height, with something of a squint and longish brown hair...he's dressed rather functionally...actually, rather dingily compared to most of Yu-Shan...
  • Carmine Rain Hunter comes up behind Arkadi as the other Red looks down the other side of the street, then clears his throat, leaning heavily on a bamboo-and-bronze spear. "I was just assigned here, can you point me to Febrisa's office?"
  • Arkadi 's head swivels around...he doesn't seem to startle too easily
  • Arkadi eyes the newcomer up and down

Arkadi: "Lemme guess...you're that Carmine guy?"

  • Carmine Rain Hunter is slightly on the tall side, normally not a notable feature, but his lean build and the close-fit armor accentuates it. His features are strong, bony, with high cheekbones, a sleek, stubbled jawline, and a slightly prominent nose that add to his wiry, hunted look.

Carmine Rain Hunter: "...yeah. I guess I am 'that Carmine guy'."

Arkadi "Yeah, Dragon-lady sent me to meet you...we're supposed to see her together..."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "...kinky."

  • Arkadi rolls his eyes "Interpret how you will..."
  • Arkadi pauses for a moment to grind the cigarette out under a boot heel

Arkadi: "You coming?"

  • Carmine Rain Hunter shrugs, following.
  • Arkadi scowls, muttering something about 'not being paid enough for this...'
  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks around the cathedral of an office as they enter, clearly impressed with the architecture. "So, uh, who are you, anyway?"
  • Febrisa waits inside, a massive serpent almost certainly 500 feet in length coiled behind a monolithic desk of black ash. Six spindly arms writhe across the desk, organizing papers. While they work, the long neck extends a heavy head, surrounded by golden hairs, toward the two men. Coiling around first Arkadi then Carmine, she smiles, exuding smoke. "He is Arkadi. I am Febrisa. And you are Carmine Rain Hunter. We are now introduced."
  • Arkadi remains studiously unimpressed

Somehow, Carmine Rain Hunter musters a pleasant, genial smile. "Well, that was painless."

Arkadi: "You're serious about what you want me to do here?"

Arkadi: "I mean, I got the letter...but well...*me* ?"

  • Carmine Rain Hunter blinks between Febrisa and Arkadi, then indicates the Sidereal. "Um, what's he here for, anyway?"

Febrisa: "Indeed. I try to make introductions as painless as possible, considering how agonizing your apprentice will be. Arkadi here will be your mentor until I decide you have learned enough to be trusted on your own. He will be watching you, staying near by, keeping tabs on your activity and emotional stability."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "...emotional stability?"

Febrisa: "If your behavior continues to deteriorate, he will be assigned to keep constant company with you. In that case, I hope your romantic inclinations run to the dour, snappish and drunken as he will be your only social contact unless one of the Health Insects approves other events."

Febrisa: "If you become hopeless, Arkadi will be in charge of overseeing your removal from the ranks of Heaven."

Arkadi: "Hey now...I'm not an assassin!"

Arkadi: "Get a bloody endings if you want THAT done."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I'm fine! I think the whole Bureaucracy is overreacting. Honestly, all I did was kill a demon. And beat the shit out of a murderer. And kill another five demons."

Febrisa: "I don't have one available. In any event, that will not happen."

Arkadi: "No, it *won't*."

  • Arkadi leaves the meaning of that deliberately unclear
  • Carmine Rain Hunter looks generically uncomfortable.
  • Arkadi doesn't seem to be particularly pleased with this situation himself

Febrisa: "Because these deeds are perfectly acceptable in *my* office. However, that is still the last-resort plan. I haven't used it in five thousand years, so you may feel secure."

Febrisa: "Everyone else died before they needed to be removed."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Um...what, exactly, does this office ¬do¬?"

Febrisa: "We investigate and remedy unforeseen disasters, such as demonic and undead incursions into Creation."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Oh. That sounds ... um ... fun?"

Arkadi: "Oh yeah, more fun than a barrel full of monkeys."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Well, it was sort of fun, in a weird way, to kill the demons."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Well, not fun. It felt like I was accomplishing something."

Arkadi: "You were."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Thought so."

Febrisa: "And now that will result in promotion and bonuses, instead of being eaten by a giant golden lion."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter blinks. "Oh. That's a change for the better, I guess. Do I get my own office?"

Arkadi: "Keep dreaming."

Febrisa: "No. You have a closet."

Arkadi: "You're talking about a bureau that isn't understaffed and underfunded."

Febrisa: "And a locker."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "It was worth a shot."

Febrisa: "Arkadi can show you where the closet and locker are."

Arkadi: "Might want to bring some air freshener."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter chuckles, setting his spear on his shoulder. "...right."
  • Arkadi shrugs

Arkadi: "That it?"

Febrisa: "If you have any questions, ask Arkadi. If you need anyone to talk to, see Arkadi. If you need some stabilizing drugs, ask a Healer Insect. Unless Carmine has other questions, you may go."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I'm fine. really."

Arkadi: "Right. C'mon."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter just nods a little and follows.

Febrisa: "Alright. The Beetle of Demonic Sexual Infections is down the hall. I think you'll be needing him. Good day."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "...what?"

Arkadi: "...WHAT?!"

Febrisa: "He's also the one in charge of assigning equipment."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "....oh."

  • Arkadi shakes his head and leaves the room...making sure the door is closed before muttering 'bitch'

Carmine Rain Hunter: "She didn't seem that bad."

Arkadi: "Don't get me started."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I won't. At least not today."

Arkadi: "Good."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "So, do I need to have equipment issued?"

Arkadi: "Damned if I know...I have zero clue what's on our list right now."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Well, I know even less."

  • Arkadi sighs "Lemme give you the score here. This is the most thankless job in Yu-Shan. We take most of the risks, the bosses get near all the perks, we get zero cooperation 'cause folks think we're gonna be indicting them on charges..."
  • Carmine Rain Hunter tucks his free hand into his belt. "I ... see."

Arkadi "Other factors tip the balance even further away from us. Bottom line, this is one of the worst postings you can GET..."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter shrugs. "I don't know about that. It sounds to me like a promotion."

Arkadi: "High risk, low pay...no help, mind naming me the shithole department you worked in BEFORE?"

  • Carmine Rain Hunter shrugs again. "Least here we do something useful."

Arkadi: "Undead and demons? We ain't the only ones."

Arkadi: "That's our job to BEGIN with, remember? This department just sort of...doubles it up on us."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Oh."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Still, the other department kind of got out of the way."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Or in the way."

  • Carmine Rain Hunter shrugs. "Who cares. I'm here now."

Arkadi: "Yeah you are...good luck, you'll need it."

Arkadi: "In my case, those departments still are...I've got 5 different bosses, plus my circle's affairs."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "...five?"

Arkadi: "Yeah."

Arkadi: "what can I say...people don't like me much."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "Let's get a drink."

Arkadi: "A-effing-men."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I knew there was some common ground. Ever been to that place over in the east district? Where there are pavilions and it's always raining and has-been gods play board games?"

Arkadi: "Only on business..."

Carmine Rain Hunter: "I like the place. Let's go. They have actual beer, you know."

Arkadi: "Works for me."


< Into the Underworld | Red Ice Logs | The Saunaplex >